Remember the time when you had set up an aim for your life. When you were a kid, you wanted to own everything.
Till 10th standard everything was blue in your life. Moving to 11th standard, you had three options- Science, Commerce and Arts. You opted for the best.
In 12th standard you focused majorly to score maximum in your board examinations. Some of you did really good, some average, some not so good.
However, 12th passed with ease. Many of you had a thought in mind to appear for competitive exams and get to a college.
Even after graduation, you left everything, to crack a competitive exam for a good post. Many dedicate their heart and soul, but are unable to clear the exam. Many were successful even!
However, we not here to praise the ones who were successful. We are here to boost the drop-outs.
Well, we all know how tough any competitive exam is. It’s absolutely not the board exam, where we mugged up everything and scored the best. It not only tests your IQ but also assess your endurance.
Any competitive exam has limited seats, a vast number of candidates and a lot of reservation. You’re very unlucky if you do not get under any category. You’re lucky, not so lucky I must say, if you are under a category.
To get a top, desired college or post, you have to have a really good rank. To get a good rank, you require hard work coupled with smart work. Lamenting for being unsuccessful is nothing but a complete waste of time and energy.
What thoughts usually arise when you take a drop?
As all fingers are not alike, different people think differently. Here, we give a list of problems you face, you can correlate. We will later be providing the solutions for the listed problems.
‘My friend has cleared the exam in one or two go, while I am still stuck here’:
This is a common thought that usually comes in one’s mind. You started the journey of struggle with them. You had worked with them.
It may hurt you sometimes when you meet them or talk to them. It will hurt even more when they will be preparing for functions in their college and you would lag behind, still preparing to get to that place.
Many of you may face this problem, especially, when you are preparing for a post-graduate competitive exam like UPSC, JPSC and stuff.
Bad scores and unsuccessful attempts may dishearten you. You may feel many a times to end your struggle.
When time for exam almost approaches and you’re not satisfied with your preparation, you may want to end everything. Social Media, though a good place to connect to people, may provoke you to take such steps.
‘What will people say?’:
Many a times people around you ask about your currier. When you say you’ve taken a drop, they give bad expressions.
They consider drop year as a waste year. More than anything, if you have judgmental relatives (I guess most of us have), they are the most irritating ones. They ask peculiar questions. They may taunt you mostly when they meet.
When you bring everything to a halt, to prepare for something, you may experience mood swings. You may feel guilty at times when you fail to achieve your daily to-do-list.
You may feel like not doing anything. Tears may roll out of your eyes, when you see little progress in your work.
You might want to take a break from the monotony, but may see a huge backlog behind. This usually occurs when you prepare from home, solely depended on self-study.
At times you mind may hang, like your mobile phone does sometimes.
When you’ve scored very bad in the first attempt, you may feel less confident. You would know what you have to do, but search YouTube or Google for the known answers.
It’s quite natural that low confidence accompanies uncertainty. You may feel that you’re not competent for the exam. You may become an escapist if you have lower sense of confidence.
Everything that is not directed towards the completion of your one primary goal, is a distraction. Scrolling memes on Instagram occupies a lot of time. You may lag much behind if these distractions come in your way.
It is said people have a higher efficiency, when they prepare along with some work. They have a pressure and know to handle it well.
However, when you take a drop, you have one sole aim. It’s quite plausible that distractions may attract your preparation. You may think you’ve a lot of time and become lethargic.
As you prepare for your exam, you may feel that you are unable to do the preparation. You may have a fear to fall. Sometimes that fear may become a hinderance in the furtherance of your goal. Weak mindset accompanies suicidal thoughts and escapist policies. It is a by product of your lower confidence.
What can be the possible solutions to the problems you face?
Every problem has a solution. Some of the solutions may be tough but to achieve success you have to follow the following instructions. We shall be listing the solutions to the problems stated above chronologically:
Identify Your Company:
You’ve always heard and understood the saying, ‘A friend in need is a friend indeed’. Well, time to apply this. Keep a company with people who encourage you.
If you friend has cracked the exam and reached the place, ask them for help. A good friend will always help you. S/he will even guide you to help crack the exam.
Stay away from the people who mock your failure. They will always discourage you. They may taunt you and be the neighbor aunty who is more interested in your household affairs and least concerned about their family.
Check your friend list. Have a small but precise circle of intellectual group of friends.
Moreover, if you’re doing good, guide the people preparing with you. This will help you to keep yourself motivated.
If one door is closed, you have many other open:
In this one life, you have numerous options. If you lose an opportunity, there are many other opportunities open for you. No job is bad or underrated. Everything done for the upliftment of the country is respected.
Suicide isn’t any option, it’s just an escape. People who want to escape the hardships take such steps. Never let your performance dishearten you. Never let the stepping stones to success be a hindrance in your way.
If you get suicidal thoughts talk to people. Talking to family about everything helps you boost up.
Read this blog if you face problems regarding your mental problems:
You’re never a burden on your family. They are ones who love your presence. If you think of taking such step, go and just spell out everything to them. They may feel bad for a moment or two that you have such things inside of you, but they are the ones who will help you out in the best way possible.
“I have taken this decision”:
No one helped you take this decision. When you faced anxiety these people never came and consoled you. They were present at the time when your results were out. They will be present when you will be preparing to ask peculiar questions.
You might have come across the saying, “Success has many fathers, failures have none”. When you succeed they are the ones to introduce you to people saying, ‘This is my brother’s son’s cousin blah blah’. However, when you fail, they are the ones who give you examples of people who have cleared the exam and taunt you.
Never be disheartened by their words. Just think about the past that they were never available to help you in times of hardship. Try to stay away from these toxic relatives and friends. Like they are least concerned about your preparation, build your mind to stay least concerned about their presence and words.
Take a break:
When you’re annoyed by the monotony, take a break. Taking a break doesn’t mean scrolling social media or doing something unproductive.
Spare your time for some hobby. When you do something that you like to do, your mind turns from passive mode to active mode. Do not forget your primary goal. When you feel better, sit with your course and practice as much you can.
This is the best way to control your mood swing problem. You may even make a routine where you keep some time for your hobby.
You have appeared for the exam once. You might have joined some coaching institution or might be preparing on your own.
At times, you may feel disheartened and need some emotional motivation. We recommend you to search the answers inside of you.
You can easily call your friend or someone you like. You may not get precise guidance from YouTube or on Google. Motivate yourself. Talk to your family and friends.
Only for the goal:
When you do something extra, like mentioned above taking a break, never involve yourself in something addictive. Addiction of anything is bad. Social media, mobile games is nothing but a waste of time and energy.
Instead do something productive, which you are interested in. Drawing, painting, writing, singing, dancing and so on never draws you away from your primary goal.
Never do anything at the stake of your studies. Never let even your hobbies distract you. You have a goal and you’re entitled to work only for the furtherance of that specified goal.
Learn to say ‘no’ to people. When your friends ask you out, say them that you’re busy in your work.
Those who will be your real friends will understand you. Fake friends will never understand you.
Like Loreal Paris shampoo advertisement says, “Five problem, one solution”, There is only one solution to all your problems. WORK HARD, Really hard for your goal!
You have kept everything at stake to take this decision. You know there is no other way but to spend time only and only with your study material.
Escapists think of committing suicide, or struggle at the last moment. You have a lot of time, when you take a firm decision to drop out. It takes strength to leave everything and work hard. You never had a weak mindset. People with weak mindset end up doing nothing.
Since you’ve taken a drop keep your aims high.
It never helps, when you sit and lament for the past. It is always preferred by the intellectuals to live and work in present.
In the drop year, thoughts like a merry future or a bad past may distract you. Reprimand yourself!
Let the alarm inside of you ring louder. Prepare a routine and strictly follow that. You’re an improver and you need lots of improvement to achieve your desired goal.
Be your mentor and your guardian. It feels horrible when after tireless efforts your mock results are bad. It hurts when parents ask you about your score and you don’t want to reply.
You have to boost yourself. You have to motivate yourself. There’s nothing you don’t know. There’s nothing you can’t do.
Stay away from unsuccessful people. They give excuses and make you feel that some things are impossible. Talk to successful people. They’ll never give you wrong suggestions.
Don’t let your insecurities come in the way of your success. Have a robust mindset.
Sit and meditate. Introspection is important. Talk to yourself about your flaws. Never count your flaws instead work to improve them.
Come out of your comfort zone. Get up early in the morning. It is said brain cells are most active at 4 A.M. Take required amount of rest.
People who lament at the last minute never worked throughout the year. Start your preparation from now and you shall get positive results.
Depression is not a disease. It’s the thought inside of us that gave birth to depression and anxiety. You cannot be a prey to anxiety unless you want it.
A psychiatrist’s treatment and the pills only have a placebo effect on you. It’s all our thoughts that make us fall into that pit of depression. It’s also our thoughts that makes us come out of that.
Work and work harder for the achievement of your goal. It’s your duty to make your drop year productive.
Sushant Singh Rajput in his movie ‘Chicchhore’ said that it’s not the results that decides whether you are a winner or a loser, it’s the efforts that decide everything.
Even if the exam is not cleared, you always have options. At least, you may never have that guilt that you never tried.
Author:- Shubhanshi from team invertedmirror.com